Blogs by Coach Dr. Paras


How to Get Rid of Fear and Build Courage in 5 Ways

It stood there cloaked in a heavy garment. The fabric weighed down heavily making it impossible for a person to move. The more one struggled with it, the more it draped the person within. Sometimes heavy, sometimes stifling.

You’ve probably sensed this feeling often. “I wish I could have done that!” The feeling of fear is one of the major obstacles to experience courage. Even then, the best way to overcome fear is to face the fear itself and not struggle against it.

Courage empowers you to face every situation in life with a strong conviction in self.

It’s our mind that complicates this issue making us feel certain emotions that are easily created with our imagination. By visualizing our worst fears coming true, we lose the ability to act upon the courage we already have. By challenging your fears, you empower yourself while discovering a new side of life - one you’ve always wanted but felt hesitant to explore.

As a Life Leadership Coach, one of the many areas I emphasize is the need to build courage. What is courage? Why do you need courage? Courage is when you learn to experience the moment for what it is and act in accordance with the situation, others, and self. Courage is that personality trait that gives you the wings to fly without the fear of falling down. Courage empowers you to face every situation in life with a strong conviction in self.

The best way to overcome fear is courage. We are the victims of fear instilled in us by others during our growing up years. Men and women, in particular, have been taught what is allowed and not allowed. Sometimes, a simple thing such as a woman being told, “You cannot fly a plane,” or a man being ridiculed, “You’d never make a good cook, so leave the dream of the culinary world,” causes many fears. Courage takes a backseat with the fear of the stigma of society.

Instead of focusing only on the causes of fears, let’s first tackle on building courage in self. You’ll find it the best way to conquer fear.

Building Courage in Self in 5 Ways: How to Remove Fear from the Mind and Heart

Come, let’s challenge your fears. Learn to take risks for success.

1. Face your Deepest Fears

As a psychologist and coach, I’d say the step one is to face your deepest fears. You cannot touch success without giving it all to reach the highest levels. Professionals, in particular, need to get to the bottom of understanding the stress levels and why it occurs. The fear of not being good enough, failure, and more will always run through us. Firstly, allow the fear to sink in and turn it into your biggest motivator. Think about how successful people do things differently. They are equally afraid of fear but the fear of not even trying and not knowing what life would have been to chase their goals and vision makes them work harder. Instead of pushing your hopes and dreams aside, know which fears are holding you back. (Worry about finance for a new business, fear of rejection in love, etc.)

One of the presuppositions of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) is that the mind and body affect each other. A change that you make within the mind, impacts the body and vice versa.

It’s time to make that change. Begin journaling your fears and start an activity that will create more courage within the self.

E.g.: Write down why you are afraid to apply for the new job. Is it the fear of failing? Think about the possibilities. Next, try an activity that liberates your soul. It can be bungee jumping, scuba diving, or anything that will dissolve your deep-rooted fears.

2. Analyze this Fear

The best way to conquer fear is to analyze it from all dimensions. Sit down, and meditate for a while. How does this fear appear? Does it have a shape? It is large? If you find the fear large, make it small. If it’s a small fear, let it move. Where do you see it going? Can you push it away to make it smaller? How does it feel to have this fear away from you? You might see this fear shapeless but of a specific color. It might even be in multi-color. How does it appear in monochrome? Think over it. Keep this practice daily till the fear appears as a minuscule object. Doing this regularly makes you view this fear differently. You notice that you can challenge this fear which is formless, and baseless, and completely conjured by your self-limiting beliefs. You can frame things differently by shaping how you think and feel about these fears. You can also reduce the anxiety by naming any failure as learning experiences and a chance to do better the next time!

3. Try New Things

One of the fear management techniques and ways to build courage in self is to try new things in your personal and professional life. By developing your physical, intellectual, and moral courage, you give yourself the opportunity to be fearless.

  • Develop physical courage by being disciplined. For e.g.: Try swimming if you fear water. Maintain a routine and you’ll soon have the willpower to face any challenge.
  • Develop intellectual courage and aim for innovation. For e.g.: invest your time in reading books and learn the importance of developing different perspectives. You’ll lead from the front.
  • Develop moral courage to stand by your personal and work ethics. Develop this practice daily. For e.g.: it can be as small as not cheating on your diet chart. You’ll find the courage you develop will give you self-confidence and you can even fight for the rights of others.

4. Connect with your Intuition

The best way to overcome fear is courage

Ever found yourself in a situation where you heard an inner voice telling you to do something differently? Most of the time, you do not listen to the inner voice. It’s about intuitively understanding what you need to do. It’s a subtle hint your inner voice gives you. It tells you what you need to do without you ever having an idea why. Our intuition has always been there for us. So, why aren’t you paying attention to it? One of the causes of fear is often because we give weightage to society’s expectation.

Here, we seek validation and listen to the critical inner voice. This voice is often harsh and instills doubts in our minds.

Listen to your intuition by -

  • Making time for solitude: Alone time is best for developing creative energy.
  • Work on creating new ideas: It can be a new dish, a new hobby. Go out there, create.
  • Practice Mindfulness daily: Develop mindfulness meditation as a daily practice.
  • Improve your power of observation: Write down the finer details.
  • Work on developing meaningful relationships: Seek depth, and it shall find you. Do away with shallow minds, relationships that no longer nurture you.
  • Develop a connection with self: Practice self-love. You’ll hear your inner voice clearly.

5. Be a risk-taker

The feeling of fear is in the mind. Be a risk taker and you’ll notice the difference. Take that first bold step to build something. One of the biggest risks is not taking any risks. That is a guarantee that you will fail.

You need to -

  • Evaluate the risk
  • Make a list of things you’ll need to do
  • Ask yourself if this risk will impart happiness to your life?
  • Work on building a list of parameters
  • Most importantly, listen to your gut.

You can never move forward if you are not able to take risks. With courage in self, you’ll notice risk-taking is not as complicated as it sounds. It’s about pushing the envelope and knowing what lights up your dreams.

Courage needs to be built by taking small steps. Start making those decisions and then move on to large goals. The more you face your fears, the more you can build courage in yourself. A courageous personality radiates that kind of optimism many cannot ignore. This is the only way to conquer your fear and build a life you desire.

Write to me at [email protected] to discover sessions useful to overcome fears and build courage in life. Do watch my videos and download the Mindfulness Practitioner App that makes practicing mindfulness so easy! Come, let’s erase this feeling of fear together and take a step towards courage.